Little 1 .
rain-fall
giggles at
good and bad
parents
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. . Welcome to Back to the Machine-Gun, blog version of the Liverpool magazine.
. . New content has been loaded.
-- some poems and information from Janette Stowell, who has a book coming out →
-- recent work from various participants →
-- a slow form record
of the physical machine-gun →
-- a radio transmission clip →
E-mail submissions/enquiries welcomed: backtothemachinegun@hotmail.com
. . New content has been loaded.
-- some poems and information from Janette Stowell, who has a book coming out →
-- recent work from various participants →
-- a slow form record
of the physical machine-gun →
-- a radio transmission clip →
E-mail submissions/enquiries welcomed: backtothemachinegun@hotmail.com
ReplyDeletemaybe it should be "rain fall"
or "rain-fall" and dreams could be replaced with "studies", or "giggles at"
"giggles at" ?
well, it was just a thing to you know .
rain-falls of good and bad dreams?
ReplyDeletei reckon hyphenate to make rainfalls an object in and of itself rather than rain which is doing something by falling, is this how grammar works or have i made that up
grammar is irrelevant here. I agree on rain-fall, I will alterate it later if that is allowed
ReplyDeletepluralise dream?
ReplyDeletesorry, i meant to say
ReplyDelete"rain-fall
dreams"
but perhaps this is getting a bit pernickety, i will try and stick to useful comments, your grammar is your own... and as you said, irrelavant here.
ReplyDeletei think it was going to be falls/ dreams so that is two verbs I suppose .
this is a place to be pernickety, mr kevins per mile, so carry on.
but what about the studies or giggles at ?
This is fantastic stuff...Im enjoying the updates...
ReplyDeleteOK. I am going to alter this poem, in real time, like some sort of stripper. Here is what it was:
ReplyDeleterain falls
dreams
of good
and bad
parents
and now I shall make it what it shall become
it seems I managed to make it better?
ReplyDeletethat is what I feel, 2 years from then