Little 2.



rain more

a part

of garden growing


4 comments:

  1. I like the way this could be read in differnet ways. Not taking anything away from your intention of course -
    'rain apart, more of garden growing' etc. Like a western haiku. Kerouac always argued that English could not fit the strict Japanese syllables required, so a western haiku should be a simple statement, eloquently stated.
    'a' and 'part' are actually the words closest together. Intersting.

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  2. thank you . You seem to have got the thing . Zukofsky does a lot of the "ambiguous multi-reading" thing. We should all read zukofsky this christmas.
    ---- and yes, it is crazy to try and do haiku using japanese syllabic form, especially when translating. All the sparseness would get cluttered with the little words.
    - - - let's think of new ways to use our own little words

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  3. perhaps it should be garden
    / - ing

    I just dont know whats good anymore

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  4. Jean-Michel?

    ........./ Let's go to Pittsburgh / ......

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